[Mick doesn't really have a ready answer to that. It isn't something he'd ever expected to hear, from anyone, let alone from Barry Allen. But then this Barry Allen isn't like the one he knows at home. This Barry Allen cares more about them than Mick could ever have predicted.
Enough that he isn't even thinking about any of his own problems that could be solved by this place. Nothing that's still coming, nothing he could head off by tweaking his incentive.]
Hell, kid.
[It's not much of an answer, but he isn't sure he could put into words what he thinks about a goddamn stupid selfless gesture like that.]
[he only gives mick a quick smile at his reaction. anyone else and he'd want to fill the silence that follows. would want to try and chase away any discomfort it may cause. but with mick, things are different, and have been for a while now. he doesn't see a reason to push for more from him. doesn't see a point to it. if mick has something to say, he'll say it.]
...how much are things going to change between us when I go back?
[it's a question that comes after a few minutes of silence. a thought that's been on his mind for weeks now. he knows that the rogues and the flash stand on opposite sides of the law. but after all they've built here between them, he doesn't know how to cope with the idea of viewing them as his enemies.]
[Telling it straight, like he always does. But he can't help tightening his arms a little, pulling the kid closer, more secure. He remembers what he'd been like back then, and he doesn't like the idea of Barry going up against past-Mick. Past-Mick is crazy, and is gonna do his damnedest to set him on fire.]
The guy you're gonna meet...he's not a nice guy. To him, you're a moving target. He's got his eye on the payoff, you're in the way, and he's gonna enjoy swatting you. ...sorry.
[he's silent, at first, taking his time to work out what to say in response to that. he'd known, of course, just how different the man he knows here is in comparison to the one that those from home had warned him about. but hearing it from mick himself-- he needs a moment.]
You've got nothing to apologize for. You're not him anymore.
[because despite his own reservations, despite the fact he was the one to ask in the first place, he knows it's a point that needs to be made. the mick he knows here isn't the same person he knows he'll meet when he goes home. and while the idea of losing all that they have here hurts, he refuses to believe it'll be anything other than a temporary loss. the rogues are too important to him now.]
When I go back, I don't want to remember this place. [which isn't quite what he means to say. but a moment spent shifting around to settle down properly, and he continues.] I can't risk changing anything. So if I go back, I want to forget this place. Just until we're all from the same time again though.
Yeah. Well. I remember him. I remember everything he did. Can't say I wouldn't do some of it again.
[But, he knows, nothing that would hurt Barry or anyone Barry cared about. Not now. And he's pretty sure Barry knows that, so he doesn't say it. That's what happens with them sometimes, they don't say it but it still gets said.
He's silent as Barry speaks, shifts, speaks again. It makes sense, better not to know what's coming if Barry doesn't want to change his own future, but a part of him still aches a little at Barry losing who he's become.]
Might be a while before that happens. Time's not so reliable these days. [But at the same time he's nodding, one hand spread out over Barry's back.] Yeah, I get it.
[doesn't matter if he has to stay here years until their timelines all line back up again. as long as there's a way to make sure that they can all return to the same world together, he'll stay however long he has to. he just isn't sure it's a sentiment shared by the others from their world. not when half of them don't even get along with each other.]
If I go back, it's only going to be so I can catch up with you guys. And I want to be able to promise you that nothing would change here if I do go, but... [even he isn't that naive. here, mick was a complete stranger to him when he arrived. he was free to build his own opinions of him, unaffected by all that would happen when he returns home.]
You need to promise me one thing. [his hold tightens around mick, his voice growing quieter.] If I come back and everything's changed, don't let me run? You guys are too important to me, and I don't-- I can't lose that because I'm being an idiot. Okay?
[Mick is silent for a long time, maybe long enough that Barry doesn't think he's going to answer. But finally he shifts and tugs a little to get Barry to look up, to look at him. This is tearing Barry up a little, having to pick between going home and living his life like he should be, or staying here and keeping what he's already got.]
Look, kid. ...Barry. 'M not telling you what to do. Don't make it a promise. But if you head home and come back here, and you don't remember...yeah. We'll remind you. I'll remind you. You're crew now, you ain't running anywhere.
[he waits silently, because that's what they do. sometimes words don't come as easily as either of them would like, but that's never meant that they've ignored anything the other person has said. it's why he's able to wait it out. why he knows that mick isn't going to dismiss his words.
though there's still a strain of doubt that briefly rises when mick finally does start to speak again. thankfully it's gone by the point he stops.]
That's enough for me. [whether it's a promise or not, knowing that mick will still be there if he does leave. that he won't give up on him-- it's enough because it has to be.] You're family. It just might take a while for me to remember that.
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Enough that he isn't even thinking about any of his own problems that could be solved by this place. Nothing that's still coming, nothing he could head off by tweaking his incentive.]
Hell, kid.
[It's not much of an answer, but he isn't sure he could put into words what he thinks about a goddamn stupid selfless gesture like that.]
no subject
...how much are things going to change between us when I go back?
[it's a question that comes after a few minutes of silence. a thought that's been on his mind for weeks now. he knows that the rogues and the flash stand on opposite sides of the law. but after all they've built here between them, he doesn't know how to cope with the idea of viewing them as his enemies.]
no subject
[Telling it straight, like he always does. But he can't help tightening his arms a little, pulling the kid closer, more secure. He remembers what he'd been like back then, and he doesn't like the idea of Barry going up against past-Mick. Past-Mick is crazy, and is gonna do his damnedest to set him on fire.]
The guy you're gonna meet...he's not a nice guy. To him, you're a moving target. He's got his eye on the payoff, you're in the way, and he's gonna enjoy swatting you. ...sorry.
no subject
You've got nothing to apologize for. You're not him anymore.
[because despite his own reservations, despite the fact he was the one to ask in the first place, he knows it's a point that needs to be made. the mick he knows here isn't the same person he knows he'll meet when he goes home. and while the idea of losing all that they have here hurts, he refuses to believe it'll be anything other than a temporary loss. the rogues are too important to him now.]
When I go back, I don't want to remember this place. [which isn't quite what he means to say. but a moment spent shifting around to settle down properly, and he continues.] I can't risk changing anything. So if I go back, I want to forget this place. Just until we're all from the same time again though.
no subject
[But, he knows, nothing that would hurt Barry or anyone Barry cared about. Not now. And he's pretty sure Barry knows that, so he doesn't say it. That's what happens with them sometimes, they don't say it but it still gets said.
He's silent as Barry speaks, shifts, speaks again. It makes sense, better not to know what's coming if Barry doesn't want to change his own future, but a part of him still aches a little at Barry losing who he's become.]
Might be a while before that happens. Time's not so reliable these days. [But at the same time he's nodding, one hand spread out over Barry's back.] Yeah, I get it.
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[doesn't matter if he has to stay here years until their timelines all line back up again. as long as there's a way to make sure that they can all return to the same world together, he'll stay however long he has to. he just isn't sure it's a sentiment shared by the others from their world. not when half of them don't even get along with each other.]
If I go back, it's only going to be so I can catch up with you guys. And I want to be able to promise you that nothing would change here if I do go, but... [even he isn't that naive. here, mick was a complete stranger to him when he arrived. he was free to build his own opinions of him, unaffected by all that would happen when he returns home.]
You need to promise me one thing. [his hold tightens around mick, his voice growing quieter.] If I come back and everything's changed, don't let me run? You guys are too important to me, and I don't-- I can't lose that because I'm being an idiot. Okay?
no subject
Look, kid. ...Barry. 'M not telling you what to do. Don't make it a promise. But if you head home and come back here, and you don't remember...yeah. We'll remind you. I'll remind you. You're crew now, you ain't running anywhere.
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though there's still a strain of doubt that briefly rises when mick finally does start to speak again. thankfully it's gone by the point he stops.]
That's enough for me. [whether it's a promise or not, knowing that mick will still be there if he does leave. that he won't give up on him-- it's enough because it has to be.] You're family. It just might take a while for me to remember that.